


Birthday Blues

by Mysticmcknight



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-11-18
Updated: 2003-11-18
Packaged: 2017-11-10 21:16:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/470779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mysticmcknight/pseuds/Mysticmcknight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chakotay is faced with the worst possible scenario…he's turning 40!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Birthday Blues

**Author's Note:**

> The characters belong to Paramount. Again since they are no longer using them I’ve decided to take our boys out of the ‘closet’ and let them play and be happy. Enjoy. 
> 
> Time of this story, Robert Beltran, who born November, 19, 1953 will be turning 50. (One can only pray to look that great at that age!) Happy Birthday Robert.

He couldn't believe it; the day he had been dreading all year finally arrived…today! He gave a heavy sigh as he sat up in bed, feeling ever ache his body had ever sustained and noted ever creak of bone and join; it was just more proof of the pudding as he would put it. He called off his alarm and slowly got to his feet and moved to the bathroom, where he called up the lights and stumbled in front of the mirror…

"Shit," he grumbled. "You look 50, not forty," he muttered, running his right hand through his short black dyed hair, "even with the hair coloring." He sighed again, "If I had the nerve I'd just let it go," he added, knowing he wouldn't stop until he had too. He couldn’t help it; he didn't like the idea of getting old, much less looking old. He felt he had hard enough time trying to compete with young bucks like Tom Paris, Harry Kim or even Greg Alaya who was five years his junior, where as Tom was…well, he was just a tad over thirty, so not that much younger, but still; he didn't have to look the part of grandpa if he didn't have too, and he didn't have too. 

"Doesn't keep everything else looking that way," he added, wishing there was skin dye for wrinkles. He turned and stripped and headed to the shower, //Glad I scheduled myself a double shift,// he thought. //Then I don't have to worry about them throwing me a stupid party, filled with gag gifts over how 'old' I'm getting,// he mentally grumbled, knowing that was what someone had in mind. Hell, they did it to Janeway last year, even if she did manage to 'hide' her age from all but the EMH, and swore him to secrecy or deletion, but Chakotay knew, she was a year older than him. This thought alone, made him smile, for he planned on using that bit of information if he had too…self defense as he looked at it. He knew she would be dying to get back at him, since he helped 'arrange' some of those gag gifts and tossed in a few himself. 

//Well, with work and my well 'established' dislike of parties, especially if they were for me, should stop any major fuss,// he hoped. No, he didn't relish in the idea of getting gifts that contain hair dye, bibs, or vitamins for the elderly, or whatever the demented minds of his crew could and would come up with given half the chance; no, he was going to do his best to avoid this, for today was depressing enough without it. 

He exited the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist and headed into the bedroom, where he slowly gathered his uniform and undergarments, very aware of what other depressing thoughts that lingered underneath. He was now 40 years old, still unmarried and without any children. His father had all three of his sons, and his two daughters along with his wife, Chakotay's mother. //And what do I have?// he finally asked himself as he plopped down on the edge of the bed to finish drying and get dressed. "Nothing," he sighed out loud, not feeling any contentment in any of his achievements. He was First Officer, but by circumstances, nothing more. He didn't even have a girlfriend, or better yet a boyfriend…a particular boy/man, though he was a friend, it was not the same and now that he was 40, he could kiss any ideas of 'that' happening goodbye.

Chakotay shook the thoughts from his head and placed on his briefs, pants, socks, then undershirt, pull over, then shoes, before jacket…it was time for a quick breakfast and then head to the bridge. He had today pretty well planed out. Baring emergencies, he'd be tied up all day and late into the evening. He even planned on eating in his office, while getting more work done…anything to avoid the 'party' he knew someone was planning somewhere at some time. He ordered his cinnamon and raisin oatmeal along with some juice and a sliced apple and sat down to eat, before beginning his busy and hopefully 'regular' day. 

*************

"Does everyone one know what to do?" a voice asked. 

"Yes, but tell me again, why are we doing this?" another asked. 

"For one, Chakotay hates parties and two, he'll never see this one coming, besides, if I know him, which I believe I do, he'll be silently sulking and this will cheer him up. Why else do you think he booked himself a double shift on his birthday…to avoid celebrating it?" 

"Um, I don't mean to be a bother, but if the Commander, doesn't want to celebrate, than…" 

"Why are we?" 

"Um, yes." 

"Because he deserves it, and I know even deeper down, he'll be hurt if we don't." 

"Yeah, that sounds like him. So, are we going to do this or what?" 

"Yeah, just make sure everyone knows their part, which shouldn't be hard. Though I do have one question…" 

"What's that?" 

"Why did 'I' get stuck with 'this'?" 

"Because with you, he'll believe it, now get moving or you'll be late." 

"Fine, I'm outta here…good luck." 

"You too." 

**************

Chakotay arrived on the bridge five minutes before his first shit to see the Captain sitting down, she had just arrived herself. "Good morning," he greeted her and everyone else. He was pleased everyone simply greeted him in return, not out of the ordinary smiles or smirks…so far so good. "Captain," he nodded as he moved to take his seat. 

"Commander," Janeway smiled and pointed to her screen. "From what I heard and gather, it was relatively slow last night." 

"Usually is on Gamma shift," Chakotay replied, just turning to see Tom Paris enter the bridge, two minutes to spare before being late. 

"Captain, Commander," Tom greeted, before greeting the others and relieving Betahart at the helm. 

"Lieutenant," both Janeway and Chakotay replied. 

Soon, it was work as normal, the bridge relatively quiet, as everyone got down to business. About forty-five minutes passed…

"Sickbay to Captain Janeway" 

"Go ahead, doctor, is there something wrong?" 

"Well, that depends," he replied in his annoyed tone, "on whether or not you deem keeping up physical fitness profiles as required by StarFleet, especially on deep space missions, important," the EMH griped. 

Janeway sighed, for she knew that short of a Red Alert, the EMH would bug her indefinitely. "Alright, Doctor, you made your point. Who do you need?" she conceded quickly in hopes to getting back to a quiet and productive day. 

"Lieutenant Paris…" 

"Figures," Harry smirks, and a few others, including Janeway and Chakotay smile, suppressing the laugh upon their lips. 

"And Commander Chakotay," the EMH finished, as did the laughing. 

"What…wait," Chakotay sputtered. "I had my physical not even three months ago," he protested. 

"I didn't say physical, I said physical profile. It is necessary for all crewmembers to have an annual profile done of their fitness, and you Commander are way over due, having managed to miss last years all together; must have been when I was down," he muttered. "As for Mr. Paris…he always tries to miss his appointments, regardless of the nature." 

"Hey, I resent that," Tom protested. 

"You mean, resemble that," Harry quipped, and a few laughed. 

Janeway smirked as she eyes both officers, "They're on their way, Doctor." 

"Captain, would you be so kind as to remind them, that for this appointment, they need to be attired correctly, since it is a heavy physical workout, as deemed by…" 

"I understand as I'm sure they are too, not to fear, Janeway out," she finished and grinned ear to ear, especially at Chakotay. "You better get going; you know how he gets when you're late." 

Chakotay groaned as he got up, "I'm going," he muttered, falling in behind Paris. "At least I'm not in this alone," he chuckled, glad that if he was going to have to suffer, he'd get a small reward…being with Tom. Tom Paris, the single most annoying, most frustrating, most sexiest and most exuberating and most special person he'd ever met…and loved. He wished they didn't have so much 'past' between them, for he believed that then…then he might have had a shot with the young man, but as it was, Tom and he did have a past, and not a too pleasant one at that. Sure they've long since became friends, but it was still there. Besides, what would a young stud like Paris be interested in an over aged, now over the hill man like him for…//Too old and too stuffy, from his perspective I'm sure,// he thought as he silently entered the lift. 

"Of all the days for him to 'remember'," Paris grumbled. 

"Tell me about it," Chakotay replied subconsciously. 

"Oh, what did you have planned?" Tom asked innocently. "I was going to meet with the Delaney's for lunch," he winked. 

"Ah…" Chakotay was caught off guard, for he didn't want to admit it was his birthday, which would spoil his efforts of avoiding the typical party and stuff. "Oh…back work, lots of back work. I'd planned to do some major catching up," he replied, which was true, to a degree. He had actually planned on getting a head of the game for a change. But this would dampen his plans a bit…but not too much. 

"Well, I guess now you have more," Tom grinned as the lift came to a stop. "I'll see you there," he slung over his shoulder as he exited the lift at his deck to go get changed. 

Chakotay didn't reply, for the doors closed quickly after Tom's departure. He rode the lift and got off his deck and wondered why he suddenly felt even more depressed. //Why are you getting all bent up about the fact he didn't wish you happy birthday…you don't want people to know, so why should Tom?// he chided himself as he entered his quarters to get changed. //Because it was Tom,// he replied softly to himself, then put the thought aside, he had things to do. 

************

The EMH true to his word, put them both through their paces, like show ponies before the show, to be sure they would perform to maximum when the time arrived. Chakotay sat panting, having just fished while Tom, who had been panting just as hard minutes ago, handed him a glass of water. 

"Here, this should help," he offered. "Once the Doc, tallies the results, we should be out of here soon," Tom added, his stomach growling, it was over an hour passed lunch. 

"Yeah, and listen to him inform us in great detail how we're not up to standards and how we lost momentum from last year," Chakotay mumbled, not needing any more proof at how old he was getting. 

"Ah, here we are," the EMH stated cheerfully as he entered the room, data pad in two. "Commander, since rank has its privileges, you're first," the Doc grinned. 

"Terrific," Chakotay replied sardonically. 

"Commander, I fail to see what you have to complain about. You are in top form, in fact, I'd say better than top form." 

"What do you mean?" he asked, not expecting this reaction. 

"I mean, that for a man your age, you surpass Fleet regulation standards by 68%, Commander. In fact, with your ratio of fitness to the regulation status quo, you have the fitness for man almost half your age…" 

"Doc…" Tom said, as if not believing him. 

"I'm serious, Lieutenant. With these latest figures, I'd place Commander Chakotay as the fittest crewmember on Voyager, followed by Commander Tuvok, then Lieutenant Alaya…you, Mr. Paris may want to take some notes," he jibbed. 

"Just what is that supposed to mean," Tom glared. 

"It means, that compared to regulations, your off by 18%, and down 2% from last year, Mr. Paris, that is what I meant." The EMH turned a smile toward the Commander, "Perhaps, Commander, you might consider giving Mr. Paris some training tips or if you could tolerate, sharing some of your workout time; it might inspire him to increase his levels…." 

"Now wait one moment, I'm in good shape…" 

"For a 38 year old man," the Doc countered. "For a 33 year old, not hardly," he smirked. "Well, if there is nothing else, you gentlemen are dismissed…until next year," the EMH stated and headed off back to his office. 

Chakotay couldn't help it, he felt on top of the world. //Can you beat that, first place…over Tuvok no less,// he grinned. Then he saw how upset Tom was from the Doctor's comments. "Hey, don't let him get to you; you're in great shape," he commented, because as far as he was concerned, Tom looked 'Great' and very beautiful. "You know as well as I, that the regs are set higher than they should be, it gives the crewmember something to do, especially during these…long missions," he added, trying not to gleam about his own good report. 

"Hrumph," Tom muttered. "Easy for you to say, Mr. Number One," he grumbled. Then he faced Chakotay, "Just what 'do' you do?" he asked, sounding seriously upset at the Doc's comments about his shape. 

"Well, I box, which constitutes a work out of running, jumping rope, pushups, foot work and practice rounds. I also hike and power-row…" 

"Power-row?" 

"Yeah, like rowing, but with the added tension on the legs, so I have to push and pull at the same time; makes it easer when I go canoeing…" 

"Canoeing, boy that sounds good. I haven't done it in ages…" 

"I have a great program I managed to save from the CrazyHorse. Perhaps sometime you'd like to join me. It also has white water rafting…" he added, wondering if he could get the young man to join him then too. 

"Oh you bet. I like water sports," he grinned. "You want to know what my favorite is?" 

"If you say synchronized swimming, I'm out of here," Chakotay teased. 

"No," Tom smirked, "its surfing." 

"Really? I love to surf, but it's been a while." 

"Yeah, me too," Tom replied, his eyes going distant, and then refocuses. "Hey, I have a great idea. How about I create us a surfing program, you know, with some of the sweetest and choicest of waves." 

"That does sound fantastic, but you best have different levels, for as I said, it's been awhile. The last time I surfed was…Trex, a year before I quit Fleet." 

"Oh, I heard Trex has some of the best spots. Was it as good as I heard?" Tom asked as he moved indicating he was ready to leave, yet was waiting for the Commander who unknowingly followed suit. 

"Totally radical experience, Tom," Chakotay grinned, recalling his time planet side. 

"Hey, why don't we swap some stories over lunch, and then I'll search the data base and between the two of us, I'm sure we can come up with a half way decent program." 

"Yeah, sure," Chakotay agreed without thought. "Just let me get showered and changed and I'll meet you there," he replied and headed in the other direction. He passed Jenny and Megan Delaney, who seconds after he passed whistled. 

"Looking good, Commander," Megan commented. 

"If that's the new uniform…count me in," Jenny smirked. 

Chakotay didn't even stop, just smiled and shook his head. Today was shaping up better than he imagined. 

Tom on the other hand had headed back to sickbay, specifically the EMH's office. "Okay, I know I said exaggerate, but I didn't say 'lie' to the man," he growled. 

"On the contrary, Mr. Paris," he stated as he stood up to meet the annoyed Lieutenant. "I didn't even have to 'exaggerate' as you put it. Everything I said to the Commander was one hundred percent true. He's in excellent shape." 

Tom blinked and straightened his shoulder, "Wow," he muttered, for he had admired Chakotay's physique for sometime, one would have to be dead not too, and even lusted after his body, he'd have to be dead not too, but he didn't know Chakotay was in 'that' great of shape. //Just imagine…// he started, but pulled back before his thoughts of the scrumptious man went too far. Only the lingering of //if only,// filtered through as he focused back at the Doc. "So, you 'weren't' exaggerating about me either?" he asked, slightly upset at his own condition. 

"Oh, well, there I did take a bit of liberty," the EMH stated flatly. 

Tom sighed in relief. "So, I'm not 18% short," he stated. 

"No, your actually 20, but I didn't want to embarrass you too much in front of the Commander," the EMH replied evenly, his eyes dancing with merriment at the pilots expense. "Now, if you excuse me, I believe you have a 'lunch' date to keep, as was planned?" he hinted. 

It was Tom's turn to look depressed as he nodded and headed out, lost in thought. 

"That wasn't very nice of you, Doctor," Kes said, having heard the entire conversation as she rounded the corner. "We wanted the Commander to have an excuse to 'invite' Tom along in his programs in hopes it will lead to other things. I don't know why you lied to him about his fitness rate; he's actually 2% over." 

"Kes, it was my understanding, that you wanted to get the Commander and Mr. Paris together, and what better way than have the Commander feel bad for the Lieutenant, even in the slightest of ways. Besides, it won't hurt Mr. Paris to exercise a bit more, now will it?" 

"I guess not. I just wish there was another way to get those two to realize they're both crazy for each other." 

"Well, from what I overheard, you're off to a great start. Lieutenant Paris has offered to create a program for the two of them, in which they inevitably share a great deal of time with one another." 

Kes nodded, "It's a start. Now, let's hurry or we'll be late," she then said, and both of them exited sickbay. 

*************

Chakotay grabbed a quick shower and changed back in his uniform, feeling great. He was just heading out when he recalled, he wanted to avoid the mess hall or any other gathering point. //But it's way after lunch or any other meal time for any of the shifts, and no one but Tom knows I'm coming, it should be safe. Then I'll head back to the bridge and then my office…piece of cake. 

He headed to the mess hall, whistling to himself, for the Doc's news couldn't be better. //Better shape than a man half his age,// now that was something. It made him forget most of his earlier worries and filled him with confidence as he strode into the mess hall…

SURPRISE!

He stood there, dumbfounded. //How…?//

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU…

//No…how did they know? I didn't even know,// he thought, seeing the mess hall crowed with people, Maquis and Fleet alike, including the Captain and…Tom! //But how did they know I'd be coming here,// he thought as the people kept singing. 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU…and many more…

A few others sang, including Neelix, who had brought out a cake with…//Please no,// he thought, but it was 40 candles shaped in a 4 and a 0. He plastered on his negotiation face, which was much better than his poker face, it made people think he liked what was happening, as he was dragged farther in the room by B'Elanna to blow out the candles. 

"Make a wish, Commander and if you blow them 'all' out, if I know my earth customs correctly, your supposed to get your wish," Neelix offered. 

Chakotay didn't bother to mention he was not from earth, but he had long gotten use to this tradition, for him and for other crewmembers and took a moment to think about what he really would wish for if he really could have a wish. Once it was clear in his head, he took a deep breath and blew…38 went out. 

"I don't recall, does that mean he doesn't get it," Neelix asked, unsure. 

"No, it just means he has to wait a while," Tom chimed in, a sweet grin on his face.

"Confess, you didn't expect this one did you," B'Elanna asked, daring him to lie, for she was pleased that she, Tom and others had pulled this one over on the Commander. 

"No…no, I wasn't," he said, glancing over at Tom, his eyes narrowed with a, I'm-going-to-get-you-for-this. But Tom just winked and smiled back, the wink taking most of the sting out of the knowing grin. 

"Come now, Commander, do you 'really' think I'd let you schedule yourself a 'double' shift…on your birthday," Janeway stated, also with a grin; a knowing and revengeful one. 

"One could only hope," he muttered as he was escorted to the chair of 'honor' where Neelix tried to place a pointed birthday hat on his head, but stopped dead in his tracks before becoming dead meat, recalling, the Commander didn't do hats…everyone else, yes…Chakotay no, regardless of what the Captain was saying to him about being a good sport. He retreated to get the rest of the food. 

"Well, if you're going to be a party pooper, we might as well end this now," she quipped. 

"Good idea," Chakotay said, getting up, only to get grabbed on the arm by Janeway. 

"Forget it mister," she growled in his ear, "If I had to go through it, you do too…hat and all," she grinned wickedly. 

He grinned back, "Just remember, the EMH is not the 'only' one who knows your true age." 

Janeway sobered, "Okay, you can skip the hat…but not the party. A lot of people went to a lot of trouble for this, and you 'will' enjoy it, got it?" 

"Yes, Captain," Chakotay relented and sat back down and took a deep breath. //Let the gag gifts begin." 

******

Chakotay sat surrounded by gifts…gag gifts as he anticipated; hair dye, not only black as he used, but a few of the crew thought he should be more daring and go with blond highlights. A few suggested other colors like, red or blue. Then there were over the hill joke shirts, one from Dalby, the other from Hogan. There were also Pads with extra large print; one being sex for the older man. He had vitamins from several female crew…vitamin E of course. Even Tuvok got in on it, by giving him a walking stick, like the older earth gentlemen used. It was very nice, long thick black wood, with a silver tip and a elegantly designed top; to his surprise, the gift was too fold, it served to fit with the theme, but inside the cane was a rapier…seemed Tuvok knew of his love for old fashioned weapons. This made it all almost worth whiled. 

//At least one gift has some use…I can poke them all in the ass if they get in my way,// he grinned. "Thank you," is what he said out loud, more to Tuvok than the others for their gifts.. 

"Don't start saying thanks yet, you haven't gotten your last gift," Tom interjected. "I mean, if you're going to be sitting around wasting away on us, you might as well do it in style," Tom grinned as he came around the group with what looked like a chair under a large cloth. 

//Oh no, not a rocker…I'll kill them,// he thought, but kept his warm grin…barely. 

Tom pulled the cloth and Chakotay was puzzled, it was one of the rec chairs…then Tom turned it around and Chakotay's eyes went wide with true happiness. "A guitar?" He couldn't believe; it was a top of the line acoustic guitar; something he had been wanting for years since being lost out here, losing his last on the CrazyHorse four years ago, but just couldn't seem to manage to save up enough ration credits to make one. "How…?" he stumbled over his words, stunned beyond belief, as he looked at those around them, all pleased that they had made their Commander very happy. 

Tom lifted the guitar gently and handed it to the Commander. "I'm sorry it doesn't have a case, but that would cost a bit more than was in the budget," Tom stated. 

"Budget…how could you…how did you know?" He was amazed that Tom knew what he wanted. 

"Well, I can't take credit for that part; B'Elanna said you had mentioned missing it. She said you use to play it when you got stressed, even sang halfway decent," Tom joked. 

"Does that mean we'll have a new participant in the talent night," Neelix asked hopefully. 

"You bet it does," Janeway answered for Chakotay with a gleam in her eyes…her revenge was served…two fold. 

"But how did you afford it…I know how much this costs, and I couldn't even come close…" 

"Now, that you 'can' credit, Tom for," B'Elanna chuckled. "He came up with the idea of us all 'pooling' our credits." 

Chakotay looked up at Tom, his eyes shouting how happy and touched he was; he wanted to hug Tom, but simply said, "Thank you." Then he pulled out of it, "Then how did you get the rest of this stuff…" 

"Oh, that was my doing," Janeway replied, pleased with herself. "I'm sure you'll find some of these things…familiar," she teased, indicating she kept a few of her own 'gifts' just for now. "The rest, I bought and handed around to those who might be…lacking," she laughed. 

Chakotay shook his head, he felt…very loved. He stood up and looked at everyone…his crew…his family. "I…I'm sure you all know how I feel about parties…" 

"Tell me about it," Greg joked. "You almost beat me up for even suggesting one back in the Maquis." 

"He threatened me with brig time last year," Tom added warmly. 

"Okay, okay, I see you do. But this…" he sighed, eying the sleek design of the instrument in his hands, which were aching to play…but it had been awhile; he would do so in private. "I want to thank you for this; truly, you've made this a very special day…thank you." 

"Enough sentiment, let's eat," B'Elanna interjected, knowing Chakotay didn't like speeches either. 

The party was a raving success and Janeway 'volunteered' to gather Chakotay's presents and beam them to his quarters, which he was sure he'd find a few more waiting for him. She also told him he had the rest of the day off, liked it or not. 

Chakotay had placed the guitar in a very safe place, and as the party was winding down, he decided to head back to his place, to check it out when Kes came up to him. "Commander, can I speak to you a moment." 

"Sure, Kes, what is it," he replied, always open to speaking to the wise and sweet Ocompan. 

Kes looked around, and saw that most folks were by the banquet table and they would be left alone for the moment. "I'd like to show you something," she said, offering him a data pad. 

Chakotay took the pad and looked at it, his brow furled in puzzlement. "I don't understand, what is this?" 

"That's the total of how much was in the pool," she replied easily. 

It took Chakotay a moment to put the pieces together, "but that's not enough…" 

"That's what I wanted to share with you, Commander…"

"But then…how?" he asked, looking at his guitar. 

Kes glanced at Tom who was teasing Neelix about his cooking again, then back at Chakotay. 

Chakotay was puzzled even more, "Why?" 

"I think you know why, Commander," she replied warmly, feeling that the two men shouldn't have to wait that long to get together, especially when such a perfect opportunity like this one fell into her lap. No one, including her didn't know what Tom had bought Chakotay, since all knew they came up short, from their goal, but when Tom said don’t worry about it, they didn't, she should have known he'd find away. Tom had used all his own saving and she thought Chakotay should know, in hopes of it bridging the two men together. 

"Why are you telling me this," Chakotay asked, not daring to hope, that what she was referring too was true. 

"Because some people deserve to get their wish to come true," she smiled, "even if it's 'not' their birthday," she added and left. The rest was up to Chakotay. 

Chakotay was stunned; Tom had somehow made up the large difference needed to assure he got the guitar he had wanted for some time…because…Tom…cared…deeply for him? //Spirits, could it be true?// he asked, but knew Kes would 'never' play games with peoples’ emotions. She only would speak up if she thought it was in the best interest of both parties, which means… Chakotay closed his eyes and prayed that it was true. //So, what are you going to do about it?// he asked himself… //I'm not sure…yet.// he grinned, wondering if this just might be one of his best birthdays yet. 

**************

"It was rather nice of the Captain to give you the rest of the day off," Tom commented, as he walked with Chakotay, both carrying a box filled with gifts. 

Chakotay had asked Kathryn 'not' to beam the items back, and when she asked why, he said he'd tell her later. As to what he was going to tell her we was not sure yet, his plan was half baked at best. At least he knew he could count on Tom's help, if he had stayed late, which he did. This along with Kes' 'hint' gave him even more courage to act on his feelings. So far things were going great; Tom agreed to help him carry the stuff back, it was two trips worth, this being their second trip and then he was going to offer Tom something to drink…that was all he had planned so far. The rest he'd have to play by ear. 

They entered Chakotay's quarters, "Just put them with the others. I'll have to find a 'place' for some of this stuff," he chuckled. "I might have to make a donation to the 'grab box' in the mess hall. 

"Ah, come on, Chakotay, you seriously thinking of giving up this classic shirt?" he teased, holding up a shirt that said: Warning, over 40 years old and disintegrating fast. 

Chakotay tried to glare at Tom, but it wasn't working, "Yes, I especially plan on losing that." Then he laughed, "But I'll have to wait a long while, until most folks forget I have it." 

"You could always give it to the Captain next year," Tom joked. 

Chakotay placed his box down and laughed, "I don't think so," he said, knowing it was already too late for that. "Care for something to drink, a birthday toast," he added, so Tom wouldn't say no. 

"Sure, what do you got?" 

"Well," he said, looking in his cabinet and pulled out a beautiful dark blue bottle, "How about this," he said showing it to Tom. He had been saving it for something special and with any luck, this would be very special indeed. "Rellian brandy." 

Tom whistled, "That's some good stuff, and expensive," he stated, surprised at being offered such good stuff. 

"Hey, I'm worth it," he grinned, really wanting to say, your worth it, but was biding his time. Seeing Tom was not going to object, he opened the bottle and saw Tom was going to put the T-shirt back in the box. "You know, if you want, you could just keep that, it's only a few more years a way," he teased. 

Tom still smarted about what the Doc had said about his fitness. "Ha, ha," Tom replied, trying to laugh it off, as he crumpled up the shirt and dropped in back in the box, before moving to get his drink. "It's just a bit more than a few, thank you very much." 

Chakotay noticed how sore Tom was by his comment, "I didn't mean anything by it," he offered. 

"Ah, it's not you, Tay, it was the Doc, and you before you say it, you're right, I'm making too much out of it," Tom replied, not noticing how he easily slipped into calling Chakotay by his 'favorite' nickname…in his dreams. 

However, Chakotay noticed the name change and smiled. "Well, here's to…wishes, may they come true," he said offering his glass up for the toast. 

"And of course…to home," Tom added, knowing that was one wish everyone made, even himself at times. 

The two men clinked their glasses and took a deep sip, both gasping from the powerful punch from the brandy. Chakotay moved to sit on the sofa, where the guitar sat by the edge, and gestured to Tom to sit with him, and was glad Tom did so easily. "Thank you again, Tom," he said, reaching out and caressing the guitar, "This really does mean a lot to me." 

Tom blushed a bit, but would say it was the brandy if pressed. "Well, it's been four years, Tay. Everyone should get what they wish for once and a while, especially out here." 

Chakotay smiled, "You know, Kes said something similar. She said some people deserve to get their wish, even when its 'not' their birthday." He saw Tom's puzzlement. He slid a bit closer to the young man, "I meant it, Tom. Thank you," he repeated, this time a bit softer, his eyes drinking in the fine delicate features of the man that stirred his passion and his heart. 

Tom was puzzled by what Chakotay said, but noticed how the older man had slid closer, his eyes intently upon him, and Tom swallowed hard, feeling the heat from Chakotay's body. "It was a joint effort, Commander," Tom replied modestly. 

"Not quiet joint," Chakotay said, looking at Tom knowingly. Seeing Tom look even more puzzled he added, "Kes told me how much was pooled…" 

Tom looked angry all of a sudden, "She had no right to do that. That's like telling someone how much you paid for their gift, it's…"

"Whoa, whoa, Tiger," Chakotay said, not able to suppress the smile, "She wasn't trying to insult me or anyone. She wanted…" 

"Just what 'did' she want?" Tom asked, placing down the glass, folding his arms, feeling very upset with the Ocompan, for this was not like her to spoil things. 

"Tom, she wanted me to know what you did…for me." 

Tom was feeling suddenly very uncomfortable. "Well…I'm sure anyone would have…" 

"I hope not," Chakotay said, not wanting Tom to brush this off. "That was a 'very' large sum, Tom."

Tom looked a way feeling blustered. "Well, it was what we all knew you wanted, but with all damage to the ship, rations are low…I just…" 

"Just what," Chakotay encouraged. 

Tom took a deep breath, "I just wanted to see you get what you want, that's all." 

Chakotay grinned, for now he could see it, Tom 'did' care for him. Question now was, how much. "Well, I want to thank you, Tom…" 

"It's not necessary, Commander," Tom interjected, arms still crossed, body language still guarded. 

Chakotay noticed the switch back to his rank, //this just won't do,// he thought and slid over right next to Tom, for it was now or never. "But I want to," he said, almost in a whisper and reached up and with a finger, guided Tom's head so he faced him and leaned in and kissed him. If he was wrong, well…it was too late now. 

The sensation of tasting Tom's sweet lips exploded like fireworks on the forth of July…earth style, it was amazing, and it was just a chase kiss. "Thank you," he breathed out, as he leaned back to meet stormy blue eyes that were slightly shut, meeting his own. 

"You're welcome," Tom puffed and not wanting to lose the momentum, leaned back in and did what he had been dreaming about for years, kissing Chakotay long and hard. 

Soon the kiss turned passionate and both men found themselves in a deep embrace of the other. Chakotay's now black eyes surveyed Tom's beautifully flushed face. "I've been crazy for you for years," he confessed. "I just never thought…" he laughed, now feeling ridiculous at how long he waited, seeing and feeling just how much Tom did want to be with him. 

Tom smiled, "you're not the only one who's been nuts," he grinned wider. "I never thought 'you' would be interested in someone like me…hoped and dreamed, but never…" 

Chakotay looked serious and cupped Tom's face. "You are a beautiful man, Tom Paris and I'm not simply talking about your gorgeous looks either. You are a deep, kind, passionate man, who I respect, like and deeply care about. I know I might not have 'always' thought that, but that is who you are now, and that is the man I want to be with. If anyone has room for doubts it's me."

"You?" 

"Yeah, me. Come on, Tom. You're young, sexy as hell and can have anyone you want. What could you possibly want in an over the hill First Officer, who spends half his time at work the other half being a stuffed shirt?" 

Tom leans back and stares at Chakotay, amazed that Chakotay had such a low opinion about himself, when most times he came across so self assured. //Guess you never know,// he thought. "Excuse me, but where did the man that is currently holding the best fit on the ship title go too?" Tom asked, arching a brow. "The man most men would give their left nut to be?" 

"Tom…"

"I'm serious, Chakotay. You're smart, strong, way built, sexy as hell, and can kick some major ass. Toss on top of that, a kind, gentle soul, with deep spiritual believes that obviously aide you in being one of the most centered people I know, and believe me I know a lot of people. I mean, what is there 'not' to like? Or better yet, you know 'my' past, how can you care about me and put yourself down?" 

Chakotay was stunned and a bit speechless. 

Tom leaned in and gave another chase kiss. "I happen to know you are the envy of every man on this ship…" 

"Not ever," Chakotay laughed, finding it difficult to take a compliment. 

"I'm serious, Chakotay. Even Tuvok has been over heard commenting on how he would find it difficult to maintain the efficient levels of the job you do." 

Chakotay's eyes went wide, "are you serious?" 

"Very," Tom said sincerely. "Though he didn't know I was around when he said it," Tom grinned to lighten the mood. "But Tay, the only one who doesn't think your capable or good enough for anything…is you. I don't understand why, but I'm going do my best to cure you of it," he said, hugging Chakotay tightly and laying another lip lock on him. "Starting with proving just how desirable you are," Tom purred. 

Chakotay opened his mouth and closed his eyes letting Tom show him just how much he wanted to kiss him, and allowed Tom full access, as he pulled the slim form tighter to him, feeling the heat from Tom's luscious body. He heard a moan escape his lips and knew it was his own, for Tom' was a fantastic kisser, setting his blood boiling. 

Tom leaned up just enough to catch his breath, "So, believe me yet?" he panted. 

"Not yet, perhaps we can take this into the bed room and you can give me another lesson," Chakotay grinned. 

"We take this into the bedroom, you'll get more than a lesson, you'll get the whole course," Tom leered. 

Chakotay stood up taking Tom by the hand, moving to the bedroom, "Bring it on, baby," he purred, his eyes black with desire as he lead Tom next to the bed. 

“First lesson,” Tom smirked, then took the lead, moving into his lover's arms and pressed his lips upon Chakotay's, then parted his lips and slipped his tongue in and tasted the warm sensuous mouth, sampling deeply, while offering his own mouth equally as he felt the kiss being returned just as eagerly. Tom's hands caressed the strong muscular back as he felt stalwart fingers move along his sides, pulling him forward so he was pressed up against the powerful body of the man before him. 

The kiss between the two men didn’t remain gentle, it develop quickly, sparking long overdue passions. Hands roamed everywhere, the need to touch powerful for both men, their fingers seeking out flesh via any crack in the other’s armor of cloth, seeking and finding, then touching. In moments both men were stripped of their shirts, then a hiss of satisfaction as their chests touched, letting more skin connect, letting a moan escaped from both set of lips, that were devouring the others. 

Before either man was aware of it, they were on Chakotay's bed, their bodies entangled, as they struggled to divest the other of their pants, while kicking off their boots, neither wanting to break the kiss, which had then both enthralled. Of course the need for air forced itself upon them and their lips parted, and their eyes opened to look deep into the other’s, both seeing passion, need, and desire within. 

"I've wished for this moment for so long," Chakotay breathed, as he gasped for air, amazed that Tom was here with him, about to make love to him. "Make love to me, Tommy," Chakotay asked, his eyes raging with need as they devoured Tom's soul with just a look. 

Tom blinked a moment, "I thought…" he stuttered, forgetting all about his 'lesson plan' after that kiss and that confession. 

Chakotay grinned wickedly, "It's my birthday, I get to choose what I want, and I want you…" he kissed Tom' on the right cheek, "To make," he kissed him on the left cheek, "love," he kissed him on the chin, "To me," he kissed Tom hard on the mouth. "Take me," he growled, reaching around and grabbing hold of Tom's delectable assets and pressing them against his hard now aching need. . 

“Oh yes, baby, I’ll take you,” Tom murmured as he kissed Chakotay’s lips deeply. Tom then pressed every inch of his own body along Chakotay's, savoring the feel of the bronze soft tissue that encased the most amazing man Tom had ever met and deep down hoped for so much more than this one night; that was 'his' wish. He aligned their erections and rubbed gently, his own body trembling from the moan of pleasure that echoed in the room from his dream man. 

The passionate siren call was all Tom needed to start his fevered devouring of the man’s skin, starting from his neck, down his sculptured chest, stopping to lick and suck each nipple to a painful erection, then further down, crossing the washboard stomach, to firm hips, where he rubbed his cheek, taking a moment to breath in the scent of his lover’s arousal, letting it drive his own desire before continuing his wet moist trail down the responsive body to the weeping cock that jutted outward almost screaming for attention. Tom then grinned and moved to the nightstand and found then removed a vial of oil, and poured it into his hand then he carefully placed it between Chakotay’s strong thighs, down along his clef, his slick fingers finding the long neglected opening and pressed in gently. 

“Yes…oh please, Tommy, please,” Chakotay panted at the touch, for he couldn’t wait any more. 

Tom smiled at his lover’s need, his own heart pounding not only from lust, but love at the sight before him. “Easy,” he purred, “We have all night," Tom purred, wanting to make this a night Chakotay would never forget, as well as be a lead in for many more to come.

“Hurry…please,” Chakotay replied, pressing himself downward in hopes of filling himself with the slim finger, but it wasn’t enough. 

Tom was overjoyed and aroused by seeing Chakotay's naked need, stirring his own, so he step up his preparations, for no matter what, he would never hurt this man…ever. Soon as he had three, he pulled out, and saw Chakotay going to roll over, but stopped him, “I want to see you,” he whispered, needing to see his lover's eyes so he knew this was real. 

Chakotay preferring this way as well, simply nodded and let Tom continue with the lead, he'd have his turn later, for he was sure there would be one. He felt the talented fingers along his thighs, then down to his legs as they were lifted and placed on strong slim shoulders, his breathing hitched at the sight and the stormy blue eyes engulfing him as Tom moved in-between his legs, his hot cock in position, then painfully slow, he felt it being pressed into his body, which started trembling with need and anticipation. He gave a soft cry of pleasure/pain as he reached up and grabbed the headboard, the shaking of his body increasing, “Tommy…please,” was all he could manage. 

“Almost,” Tom panted, determined not to hurt Tay, and soon he was inside, and he had to still himself or he would come just from the connection, for Chakotay was hot and tight, and seeing him sprawled out before him, his magnificent body glistening, his eye black and smoldering, offering himself, was a vision he wanted to burn into his brain forever, for this would be their first time and he prayed it would not be their last. “Beautiful,” slipped passed his lips in reverence, before the need to thrust over took him, then he did so with a primal need to claim the man before him. He bit his own lip to keep the word ‘mine’ from escaping, it was not time…yet, but knew the very moment they connected, Chakotay was the one; he couldn't believe the incredible gift 'he' was receiving this very night. 

Tom was thrusting into him fast and hard and he loved every bit of it as he used his grip on the headboard to push himself into each thrust, driving Tom in deeper, caressing that spot that ached to connect with the cock moving within him, and Tom connected with it over and over again. “Tommy…Tommy, oh yes….yes…” he sobbed his body on overload as the tingling that signaled the beginning of the end fired without being touched anywhere else. “I’m going to…oh, Tommy I’m coming…” he shouted moments before his body triggered every muscle he had into tightening, forcing out every drop of his essence and his passion in a roar of delight, covering Tom’s own cry of passion as he too came fast and hard. 

Soon both men lay panting, entwined with each other. Tom made to move, but Chakotay held him tight, "Stay, please," he whispered, his eyes closed, drinking in each moment, each sensation that still rippled through his body. "That…was the most amazing, most…incredible," Chakotay laughed. 

Tom leaned up, his eyes alight with afterglow, "What?" he asked, wondering what Chakotay found so funny. 

"Nothing really, its just, it's real…you're really here with me…on my birthday," Chakotay chuckled again, not truly understanding why his addle brain found it amusing. 

"Happy Birthday, Big Guy," Tom smiled and kissed his lover slowly and tenderly. 

Chakotay met Tom's eyes, "You're the best present ever, Tom…ever." 

Tom's face could light up the Delta he was so happy. "So, does that mean you got what you wished for?" 

"Sort of, definitely a big part of it," Chakotay teased, reaching down and pulling up the sheet around them. 

"Oh, just what 'did' you wish for?" 

"I'll tell you…next year," Chakotay smirked and rolled them to their sides as they settled into each other, and kissed Tom senseless, making Tom forget all about the question. The both men curled up and in minutes, Tom was asleep in Chakotay's arms. 

Chakotay still couldn't believe it…he finally had Tom. //I guess missing a few candles means you’re a year behind,// he mused to himself as he watched his new lover sleep. //Last year I wished for you and here you are. This year I wished for this day to become something else...wedding and wedding anniversary works,// he smirks happily as he too settles down with his love. 

"Happy birthday," Tom murmured, not quiet as asleep as Chakotay thought, but over halfway there. 

"It is, Tommy, it is," Chakotay replied truthfully as he too fell asleep, ending this most dreaded day. 

THE END


End file.
